Category: Acting & Theatre

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Quit acting? Not yet…

When I named this blog ‘Chasing my only dream’, I was being honest. It really was my only dream. Yes, I am saying WAS. Things have changed in the past couple of years and in my journey so far, I have reached a point where I have picked up other interests, other skills, other DREAMS!

After my corporate life ended in 2012, I decided to focus only on acting. It primarily meant looking for acting work and rehearsing as much as I could at home. I started going to every studio I knew and checked if i was fit to audition. 9 out of 10 times, I wasn’t. This was not new to me but when you have nothing else to do, this gets depressing pretty soon. Yes, I got a small role in a major film. However, my total number of work days was less than 25. Add to that a few days of assisting on ad films, shooting for a short film, and some theatre rehearsals and shows. It still summed up to about 50. What does a guy do for the remaining 315 days of the year?

While I don’t think this is the case for all aspiring actors, I was not okay with this for myself. I was in my late 20s and did not want to spend most of my adult life just “looking for work”. This is when I remembered the words of a teacher in my life  I have always looked up to.

I had worked with Neeraj Kabi as a production controller for his production of Hamlet which till date, is the finest play I have seen in my life. I was fortunate to be part of a team which included terrific actors like Shivani Tanksale, Neil Bhoopalam, Reshma Shetty, Mandar Gokhale and Ujjwal Chopra amongst others. Although I only did backstage, admin and production work for a whole year, the time I spent with Neeraj Sir gave me the light that still guides me through.

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When I took his 10-day acting workshop, he used a phrase I can never forget – “shopping for life”. I can never be as articulate as he was but the gist of it is – you need to live your life, have all the experiences you possibly can, to become a better actor. He said acting is a craft and you need at least 10-15 years to be good at it, may be even more. But you keep living your life, and you keep doing your riyaz as an actor! He also said that there is no point taking pride doing a huge number of shows if you are not growing.

This is when I thought – can I really become a better actor if I spend all my time looking for acting work, doing these little roles here and there which finally just come down to memorizing lines and reproducing them in front of the camera. Even if I do get an excellent role, what experiences do i have to be able to do justice to it? While I was lost in this thought not knowing where to head, I saw in the news that Uttarakhand was hit by floods and there was tremendous loss of lives and property. I spoke with my friend Nikhil Bangera, made some arrangements, and 10 days later, I was in Uttarakhand as a volunteer.

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My trip was supposed to be a 10-day trip where I was just help as much as I can and get back. But the most wonderful thing happened then. I met a bunch of kids who lived in a school named SNC. We connected in our first meeting and they insisted I stay with them. I took an English session for them (these were all Hindi medium kids) one morning and continued doing my volunteer work the rest of the day. I met several families with old parents who had lost their sons – some very young, others who were themselves fathers to infants. Along with local volunteers, I traveled to villages for surveys, delivering food and solar lamps, and sent reports to organisations for more help (all under SNC which is also an NGO). No matter how bad things got and how low I felt, getting back to the kids was a delight. I ended up living in Uttarakhand for 2 months.

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In this time, as a payback to these little sweethearts, I started teaching them English since they had enjoyed the session I had conducted. They were all extremely sharp kids but were not exposed to the English language. We started lessons at 7 am every morning and by the end of 2 months, we had completed an entire basic English module. I sat with each one of them and gave them feedback on their progress as some of my teachers used to give me. I was overwhelmed by their enthusiasm and quest to learn whatever they could. I also ended up doing two plays with them – one on the story of Snow White (a version they narrated to me in Hindi and then we translated together in English) and Krishnaleela on the day of Janmashtami where I played Kans! I was surprised at this opportunity to act arising out of the least expected place. Also, the dedication and zest with which these kids worked on their lines, costumes, song and dance sequences put all of my preparation as an actor to shame. On the day of the performance, the girl playing Yashoda burst into tears during the scene when Krishna leaves for Mathura. She went on and on even when she was backstage and stopped only after I consoled her for a few minutes (right till the time of my entry). I could see around 200 villagers in the audience, all getting emotional at each and every scene. I was only hoping that they do not hate me after I played Kans! But mercifully, nothing of that sort happened and the show was perhaps the most memorable performance and experience of my life! I said to myself that if I really wanted to act, life will present me with an opportunity one way or the other. But if I give up on these experiences, I will probably never grow.

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After I came back to Mumbai, I tried to get a fresh perspective on things. I got another film project, a couple of stints with TVF and a wonderful short film. I started traveling more. I did a bike trip from Mumbai to Rajasthan where my friend and I covered Barmer, Jaisalmer, Jodhpur,  Pokhran, Osian and Ranakpur. A couple of months later, I did another Delhi-Agra-Rajasthan trip with my actor friend Deshik Vansadia and two lovely ladies from the U.S. of A.

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This was followed by some Goa trips and another snow trek in Uttarakhand and some adventures in Rishikesh. Recently, I backpacked solo across Himachal where I visited Kasol, Tosh, Kheerganga, Rewalsar and spent one crazy night in Delhi. I also did a solo bike trip across Assam and Meghalaya. India is absolutely stunning! All you guys reading this – please PLEASE go see as much of India as you can. You will be amazed at how much it has to offer! You can read about my travel experiences on my travel blog here.

The teaching experience in Uttarakhand was quite fulfilling so I thought I should take it forward. This has led to me teaching street kids in Mumbai as a volunteer. My friend Nikhil, who gave up his managerial job to pursue a career in Education, is my inspiration for this. I have always believed in the power of education to solve India’s problems and may be, as part of the youth of my nation, I can play a little role in it.

The auditions have dried up a bit recently but life goes alright. Every once in a while I do get called by some casting directors like Abhishek Banerjee and Anmol Ahuja for an ad audition. I have taken up a job as a Travel content writer so that I can save some money to be able to travel more. I have met many new people in my new office, made new friends, and had embarrassing  and awkward experiences. I continue to look for theatre work and performance opportunities more than auditions.

So what I am trying to say is this – things have been changing and I have been trying to embrace the change. Call it loss of focus if you will but I am actually enjoying this – trying to juggle acting, travel and teaching. I can’t see where I am going from here. I am anxious. I am also excited to see what happens from here on. I know for sure that I am in no way going to give up acting. I still text casting directors to ask for work. I still look for theatre opportunities. But now, I don’t have the craving to be a “star”. I don’t like the cost benefit ratio. I want to live my life, see the world, and in the bargain, I believe I will become a much better actor than I am today. It’s time to “SHOP FOR LIFE”.

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TVF Qtiyapa – My first experience with the genius gems of The Viral Fever

In early 2014, my friend Nidhi Bisht called me one evening. She asked me if I was free to shoot a video with TVF in a couple of days. The role was that of Eeshwar Bhagwan – a south Indian choreographer/director who is making a 200-crore film starring the “Bhai” of Bollywood. You can connect the dots. I didn’t have to think twice before saying ‘Of course, I’d love to’. She asked me to coordinate with Amit Golani a.k.a Golu who was to direct this video.

I had met almost the entire team of TVF when they came to watch our play ‘Who let the dogs out’ which incidentally is directed by Bisht. However, fate never presented me with an opportunity to work with them until this project. Bisht thought I would be fit for the part as she had seen me do a South Indian accent in our play and also some of my dancing skills.

I was called to the TVF office at Aaram Nagar at 1pm. I reached a few minutes before Amit and was staying out of the sight of some stray dogs (I’m very scared of dogs) when a rickshaw came and stopped before me. Amit paid the driver, greeted me and we walked inside. My experience has shown me that the most talented guys are also the ones who are the most humble. It took just a minute with Amit to know that he was one of them – a simple, earthy guy whose talent could intimidate you but presence, never will.

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Many of my friends had already visited the TVF office but this was my first time. It was a new office they had recently moved into and everything looked messy. The door opened to a big room (more in length than breadth) where few plastic Nilkamal chairs were placed. I was surprised when a couple of days later, I saw the same room converted into a magnificent set for our shoot. A month later the left quarter of the same room was converted into a writer’s bay covered with hanging mats. (This is where all those terrific scripts now come from!)

Amit gave me a short narration of the script and called me for a reading later that evening. It was in the same office but further down from the main hall. The other end of the hall had a door which opened to a lobby attached to a small cabin. This was Arunabh’s office and the Edit bay. It further led to an open backyard with trees, and some benches where people chatted over chai and sutta. The whole team of TVF was already there – Arunabh, Bisht, Bisso, Jeetu, Raghav, Amrit, Prem, and Golu of course.

They told me that it was actually Arunabh, the founder of TVF, who was to play the part but had to back out at the last minute due to some other commitments. This is when Bisht had suggested my name. We started reading and everybody seemed to like the way I was reading my part. By the time we ended, I knew exactly what was required of me in the shoot.

I spent the next couple of days watching the south Indian director’s interviews and several of his dance videos. This guy was unbelievably spectacular! Out of the 100 steps I tried, I could only manage to get around 4-5 right. I practiced the accent and spoke with my roommates in the same accent till the day of the shoot. I read about his life and tried to get an insight of the kind of person he might be. Two days later, I still felt I wasn’t ready but it was time to go. There is no denying that I was nervous as shit. It was probably the most challenging role I had ever played on camera, certainly the meatiest and it was for TVF! I knew that thousands of people were going to watch this one.

The shoot was scheduled across 2 days. Day 1 was at the TVF office in Aaram Nagar and through the night into Day 2 at an office in Powai and an outdoor set in Madh Island. I had no clue how so many shots could be covered in such a short duration. I just went with the flow.

We started with the static bits where each actor just spoke to the camera like you see in the “making of” videos. This was followed by the dance sequence and other indoor scenes. Finally, the outdoor scenes were shot in Madh island. And so, we kept shooting scene after scene. Some scenes were wrapped up in no time but there were some so funny that the actors and the crew could barely control their laughter – like the scene where bhai learns his dance moves or the one where Khatrughan delivers her dialogue (Nidhi Bisht brings on her A game!). Every take left people in splits causing more retakes. Needless to say that it was all totally worth it!

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The most irritating part for me was the beard. This was the first time I was shooting with a fake beard. It had to be stuck with a solution which was very… well… sticky! We were shooting in the beginning of summer so it was pretty hot. And while I hardly noticed anything when I was performing my part, the long breaks with the beard on were quite annoying.

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Mercifully, one of the greatest things about working with the guys at TVF is that they are all at their humorous best regardless of how tense the situation or how hectic the schedule. Of course, they are all thorough professionals who know when to shut up and focus too. In general, they are a happy, hilarious bunch of people on set who maintain a convivial atmosphere and never make you feel bored. I guess this is what transpires in the work that they do.

Anyway, while it seemed impossible to me at first, the way the TVF team wrapped up the entire shoot in such a short while blew my mind away! I was eagerly waiting for the edit and when I saw the final video, I fell short of words to praise the team. I had seen their work but being a part of it was just an outstanding experience.

It is obvious that these guys are supremely talented. But that is never enough, is it? They are also smart, funny, efficient, and professional. But that doesn’t suffice too. I guess what does the trick is – how badly they want to do this and how much they are willing to put at stake. May be this is what the ridiculously overused word ‘passion’ really means! Be it the art direction team, the ADs, the actors, the director, the writers, the musicians or the founder – every person you see on the team in any TVF project is someone who really realllllyyy wants to be there. They love what they do and they put their heart, sweat and soul into it. It would be fair to say that they have dedicated their lives to this.

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Regardless of who you are and what you do, one day with TVF can inspire you to follow your dream. And also make you feel how TVF deserves every bit of the success it has achieved.

If you guys at TVF are reading this – Bisht, Bisso, Golu, Anand, Deepak, Jeetu, Amrit, Raghav, Prem, Vaibhav and of course, Arunabh – I love you all and I have enjoyed every bit of my work and association with you! More importantly , you are a huge inspiration for me and so many others. Keep experimenting… Keep leading the way!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hD5SAS8h3gY

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2 States is done.. Now what??

I was sitting on the couch at my place in Andheri. It was 3 in the afternoon and I realized that my life had returned to being pretty much the same as it was before I shot for 2 states. Most part of my day was being spent just lying around doing nothing. This bothered me because I had always believed that no matter what we do, we should try to build an upward graph otherwise all your previous work goes wasted. However, I was suddenly feeling reluctant to go hunting for auditions. I dreaded hearing the “Not fit” that I usually heard almost every time I walked in for an audition that I wasn’t called for. I felt very uncomfortable with the thought of going back in those huge crowds of aspiring actors who flock audition studio doors waiting for their turn. And there are always some smart asses who jump their turn in the cue-sheet and end up getting in ahead of the others. I asked myself if I was getting complacent after doing a Dharma film. But that was certainly not the case as I clearly knew that my role is 2 States wasn’t big enough for me to even relax thinking that I have done a big banner film. It was more like the role of a background artist. Then what was stopping me from getting back out there? It was FEAR. The fear of getting back into the world of auditions, meetings and the so-called “struggle” which always made me think that I was a misfit there. I had loved every bit of the shooting process though. Being on set, acting in a film, rehearsing my part and playing it in front of the camera… was every bit as cool as I had imagined it to be. I had brushed shoulders with Arjun and Alia.. had little conversations with Remo and Binod Pradhan. Now, getting back into the crowd where I was a nobody and the urge to crack it again to be on a similar set-up was frightening me. It was making me extremely nervous. It took me a while to tell myself that life moves on. I should be prepared to even think that the Dharma gig was a fluke and I might not work with a big banner again. Does that mean I will stop acting? No! Does that mean that I will put my acting life on hold till I get a call again from Dharma or Yash Raj or any of such big names? Of course not! And not just me, even the biggest of stars don’t do just big banner work. Everybody from Amitabh Bachchan to Shah Rukh Khan, from Madhuri Dixit to Vidya Balan, from Paresh Rawal to Anupam Kher… EVERYBODY has worked in all kinds of films made by all kinds of banners. So who am I? With that in mind, I started looking for auditions again. However, before I could go hunting for an audition, it found me. I got a call from my friend Manoj Kirdat, who was my ex-roomie. He was assisting in a small-budget film which was to cast all new actors. He told me it was being directed by Sunil Subramani, who has been Anurag Basu’s assistant for many years. He asked me if I would be interested to audition for it. I immediately said Yes. I was called to the Santacruz office of Mahima Productions for an audition. Manoj met me there and gave me a brief of 2 characters. AD Avinash then auditioned me for both the characters – one a chawl hooligan and the other an office guy – both were to be the protagonist’s friends. My auditions were recorded and I was told someone will get back to me. A few days later I got a call from Sikander bhai from the production department informing me that I was selected for the chawl guy Pakya’s role.  I then had a meeting with the director, Sunil, to discuss my character and look and in about a week’s time, we were shooting my first scene. The film was to be called ‘Fuddu’.

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The Ahmadabad Schedule of 2 states – Part 2

The next day was to be the day of shooting the placements scene. When I walked into the costume department, I was given a cool shirt, trousers and a suit. I do not own a suit and the only time I had worn one was for a play. I had loved wearing it. And the one Nikita and Natascha had picked for me was awesome. After I got dressed, Nikita confirmed that I was looking great. I then moved to the floor where the shot was set up. I was asked to wait while some other scene in which I wasn’t required was being shot. It was 9 in the morning. The sun was beginning to shine brighter and brighter making the shirt inside my blazer more and more moist with sweat. Wearing the blazer in the Ahmadabad heat was killing me so after a while, I took it off. Thankfully then, I found my way to an air-conditioned room where some ADs and technicians were working. I pulled up a chair and sat in a corner. After I got there, things weren’t too bad. I waited, played games on my phone, chatted for a while with Sakshi (who kept going out and coming in as per her requirement in shots), and before I realized, it was lunch time. The food counters were set up outdoors next to the WIMWI souvenir shop. I was extremely cautious that I don’t spoil my costume while eating by accidentally dropping food on it. So, I maintained a good distance (about a foot and a half) from the table where I kept my plate and did an entire ab crunch as I bent down to put morsels into my mouth. I got back into the room as soon as I could.

The afternoon passed as people from the production and direction team kept coming into the room for some work or the other. I kept thinking about how cool it would be to see myself on the big screen wearing a suit. The memory of Nikita saying that I looked great kept making me smile and wonder how my friends would feel when they see the cool, suited-up Dilip on the big screen. But as I kept waiting for someone to call me for my shot, pack up was announced at around 7pm. It was the end of the placement scene. This was the first time that I had dressed up for a shot and was not made to shoot. It reminded me of college days when I was a bench player for my basketball team. Of course, there was nothing to complain – I was getting paid for the day, was fed meals on time and was hosted in an AC room. I thought this was perhaps one of the better treatments beginners get in this industry. Kriti, Karina and Ishaan might have sensed that I was disappointed about what happened. Ishaan walked up to me and told me that this happens sometimes. It is part and parcel of the process. I understood what he meant. It was just new to me and I was feeling a bit disappointed on losing an opportunity to be filmed in a suit. Also, I was very nervous about the extent of my appearance in the film. So far, it was looking as if I won’t be seen in the film at all. However, little did I know that from that moment onwards, things were only going to look up. What followed in the days to come was the most enjoyable time of my Ahmedabad schedule.

Later that night, Karina informed me that I was not needed to come in early the next day. She made sure that I reached the set only when I was actually needed. Once I was on set (around 1 pm), I was informed that we were to shoot some song cuts in the classroom for which I was to be in the same frame as Arjun. We were also to shoot a small scene later between Arjun and Alia where I had a line to say and all the 5 Mohits had a reaction to give. This got me super excited! Finally, I was to do something more than just standing in the background. I was dying to PERFORM and as small as this scene was, here was my chance! My costumes were being changed as per what Arjun was wearing. It had to be made sure that the frame looked pleasant. I sat next to Arjun and while the shot was being set up, we had our first little chat. I told him about his fan Harshita who had contacted me and asked me to give him a message. He smiled and acknowledged that he knew her. We spoke a bit about other stuff and then a couple of minutes later, the best part of the day came upon us. The part when the gorgeous, stunning Alia walked into the room. This had now become an everyday routine. Amidst a regular day of work with usual on-set activities when things would look dull and boring, Alia, wearing Manish Malhotra’ amazing creations, would walk on to the set and everybody’s jaws would drop. I could hear girls sighing “WOW” and boys saying.. well.. all kinds of stuff! She changed the entire atmosphere as soon as she walked in. The Ahmedabad heat did not burn as much. The wait for Abhishek’s “Action” did not seem long anymore. Like they show in Bollywood films, it became breezy and smelled rosy all of a sudden.You just did not want to take your eyes off her beautiful face, her cute dimples, her wavy hair and that smile which could cast a hypnotic spell on anybody. I am an actor and I hope to do many films, and shoot in several schedules and be on many sets in my life. But I am sure that these will always be my favourite on-set moments – Alia Bhatt walking in to give a shot!

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Anyway, the shot was almost ready when Nikita walked up to me with a red kurta just before Binod Sir was about to roll and asked me to change. Abhishek was not happy with what I was wearing and wanted a change in colour. As always, the team was extremely determined to get the colour combination, the background and the look exactly as per their vision. Now, as you might have read in one of my previous posts, I am very shy about taking off my shirt in public. I wanted to rush to a corner but Arjun’s make-up man Raju Bhai noticed my shyness and shouted out – “Arre yaar apun artist hai.. sharma mat.. nikaal shirt idhar hi bindaas” (We are artists.. don’t be shy.. just take off your shirt). Thanks to Raju Bhai’s loud announcement, most of the background artists who were doing their own stuff so far were now looking at me. That was fine. What sucked was that Alia stood right in front of me chatting with Arjun and Abhishek. When you go shirtless in front of a girl, you want to be confident about what lies underneath. And when that girl is Alia Bhatt, you want to have the best physique possible. I, on the other hand, had what could probably be the worst physique in that classroom. And yet, there was no way out. I quickly turned my back towards Arjun and Alia and changed looking at Raju Bhai who kept giggling as I did so. Thankfully, they were so busy chatting that Alia never looked at me. At least I hope she didn’t.

Then, there was some problem with the light and the set up was to take longer. So I just sat next to Arjun waiting for it when the weirdest thing happened. Alia walked up to Arjun from my left and Abhishek walked up from the front and the four of us formed a small little quadrangle. At this point Alia held the bench I was leaning on and her hand slightly touched mine. I got very nervous and moved my hand inwards. And now, Alia, Arjun and Abhishek got into a discussion about some shoot schedule stuff. All I can say about that discussion is that it made me realize how professional Arjun was. He had some other projects going and was very particular about keeping all his commitments. He was absolutely certain that he wanted to accommodate everything that required his attention. This whole discussion went on for about 10-15 minutes and all this while, I just sat there between the three of them.. not moving an inch.. not saying a word.. and very very conscious that Alia was standing so close to me! There were times when I wanted to contribute to the discussion but I thought it would be awkward as it didn’t concern me at all. So I just kept quiet. And just as I was getting used to and comfortable with the 3 of them near me, Binod Sir was ready to shoot. There will be a time when I might get very comfortable with stars and superstars around me but I will never forget these restless moments spent between Arjun, Alia and Abhishek!

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After this incident, shoot was fun. It was easy to look at Arjun and Alia and smile normally as a normal person would. Then, the little scene was shot where I had a line to say to Arjun and I thought “Yaaayyyyy! At least I now have as many lines as I had in The Dirty Picture… ONE!” :D. We shot some more song cuts in the days to come. A few days later, on a hot Ahmadabad afternoon, we shot a scene with Alia wearing hot pants (the one you might have seen in the promos). I was supposed to be sitting in the campus reacting to Alia’s shorts as Arjun and Alia walked in front of me. This scene was shot right in the middle of the afternoon and the heat was the worst I had witnessed during the entire shoot. Our chief AD, Pravesh kept instructing me to move into the shade every time the shot was cut. Acheet Dada from production kept getting everyone water bottles to keep them hydrated. And Arjun and Alia did their best to wrap up the scene as quickly as possible. However, by the end of that day, I was so tanned that one could notice the difference on my face. It was almost like a burn. I had a word with Binod Sir about the Ahmedabad heat and he said, “Have you never been to Ahmedabad before?” I told him that I had visited once for a few hours but this was the first time I was here for so long. He said “Ahmedabad is known for this. This is how it is over here..always!” Nevertheless, it was a good experience and once again, was a reality check that acting outdoors is not child’s play. Actors need to be prepared to work in such conditions or even worse.

Sid came back in a couple of days and we shot the convocation scene, once again under the hot Ahmedabad sun. The job done by all the ADs on this day is commendable. They had to manage a huge crowd of a few hundred people and they did it very efficiently. AD Karina, who has the most adorable accent when she speaks in Hindi, exercised the full capacity of her throat as she kept shouting and asking artists to get ready and reach the set. I will never forget her trying to tell a few girls – “aap log… (pause and hand gesture)… udhar pe… (pause and head shake)… jaao”. The shoot was also interrupted by rain due to which it had to be carried over to the next day. But the team managed it quite easily and actually ended up wrapping up the shoot earlier than expected. It was a pleasant sight looking at the ADs playing in the rain and clicking pictures, taking some time off their super busy schedule.

And then came the day when I saw how supremely popular our choreographer REMO was amongst the people of India. We were shooting for a song called ‘Locha-e-ulfat’ in the new IIM campus. As usual, Kshamata and the rest of the art department had done a marvellous job setting up a colourful background against which Arjun was to dance.

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I too was one of the many people dancing behind him. Remo was at his best throughout the shoot. Although he was very serious about his work, he had a lighter side to him which often showed in his one liners. For one of the cuts he asked people at the back to do any activity of their choice while Arjun walked forward. After one take, he shouted “Cut” because he realized everyone behind did just one thing – Look at the book they had in their hands. He announced on the mike – “ Waah, yeh kaunsa college hai yaar jahaan itni padhaai hoti hai?? Aur koi activity hi nahin hoti!” (Which college is this where the only activity done is studying?) Everybody burst out laughing. When pack up was announced after a fun-filled day of dance, crowds had already gathered around the campus to see the shoot. When artists started leaving, the crowds came in and I thought they would all flock Arjun and Alia for pictures. But what I saw was that they all ran straight towards Remo. Group after group, people went to him, shook his hand, and clicked pictures with him while he obliged. What should be a 10-minute walk to the main entrance took Remo almost 30 minutes. I was amazed at the love people had for him. And why not?!?Such a great guy – an immensely talented and successful choreographer and yet so humble!

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On one of the last few nights of shooting in Ahmadabad, we were to do a little scene where I got my second line in the film. This last minute addition came as a pleasant surprise to me. I was happy that it gave me a chance to be a bit more visible in the film. At the same time, I felt a bit disheartened that this came at a point when I was looking the worst I have looked in a long time. Due to shooting in the sun over the last few days, my face was messed up and make up was not helping. However, I said to myself that my role was such that I did not need to look “good”. I was playing an IIM nerd and my own understanding of my character said that he doesn’t care about how he looks. Plus, after this entire experience, I was extremely happy to just be a part of 2 states. It had given me an opportunity to be an actor in a Dharma film, to be present on a Dharma set, to witness something fantastic being made. I was working with the likes of Binod Pradhan, Abhishek Varman, Arjun Kapoor, and Alia Bhatt. Line or no line, looking good or not good was just not that important. I was just HAPPY to be there. And I just wanted to give it everything that I got – my 100%!

We shot the scene with Arjun and Alia standing near a tea stall in the campus. We did a couple of takes and Binod Sir also took a close up of mine. This is where Arjun sweetly volunteered to stand behind the camera and give me an expression so that I could react to him. He didn’t have to do this… not for a new actor like me whom he hardly knew. But that was just how dedicated he was to a scene. He wanted everything to work perfectly. And being a humble, grounded guy by nature, this gesture came pretty naturally to him. I was also very impressed with his wit and humour during the entire shooting process. I remember for one of the song cuts , we shot an exam sequence where we were asked to submit our answer sheets one by one on “Action”. Seconds before our AD Arif was to call “Action”, Arjun pointed out that he hasn’t been given an answer sheet to submit and said – “There is only so much I can act, you know!” 😀

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On the last day of shoot in Ahmadabad, I was given a half-sleeved, Eureka Forbes kind of a shirt for a little song cut that was to be shot in the library. Alia looked at me and smiled as we said ‘Hi’ to each other for the last time. Her smile was a bit more like a laugh. I guess it must be because of what I was wearing. After that, it was a wrap for Sid and me. I met Arjun, Alia, Abhishek, Binod Sir and the team of ADs and Production before leaving the set. I thanked them for what had been the greatest shooting experience of my life. A day later, I was back in Mumbai looking for work.

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The Ahmedabad schedule of 2 states – Part 1

Bus seats were booked for Sid and me to reach Ahmadabad one day before the day of our shoot. After the regular ‘me being late, Sid panicking and calling 1000 times, and we still reaching the bus stop well before time’ stuff, we boarded the bus and reached Ahmadabad right on schedule. We were put up in the Nami Residency hotel along with other crew members. The rest of the cast that had arrived a few days earlier were in another hotel a few kilometers away from ours. So, we were to meet them directly on set the next day. After Siddharth’s photo session in the room (he insisted on doing one everywhere we went), we had a good night’s sleep and were on the sets at 6.30 the next morning as per our call time.

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As one can imagine, day 1 was to be the most exciting. We were to shoot inside the IIM campus at Ahmadabad. This was a big BIG deal for me for a lot of reasons. Although I always wanted to be an actor, I had been an engineering student and I knew how almost every other engineer dreams of making it through IIM for MBA after graduation! I was no exception. I always fancied studying at the IIM-A… being as smart as the students there… living life in the IIM campus that I had heard and read so much about. Another huge reason behind my happiness and excitement was the research I did as an actor before I left for Ahmadabad. I found out everything there was to know about the lives of students at IIM. I spoke with a friend who had just graduated from this institute, saw videos, read articles… I knew what their day looks like, when they usually wake up, sleep, study… what and where they usually eat… what are their biggest challenges, what are their highest highs and lowest lows… how they talk and what are their frequently used phrases.. and while going through this process, I actually ended up becoming a guy who was ready to enter IIM as a student. Even in the bus, I felt anxious, nervous and at the same time happy and excited just like a student feels before he begins a new course at an esteemed institution. My situation of going for my first outdoor shoot to Ahmadabad had merged with that of my character’s who was a guy beginning his 2-year MBA course at IIM!

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So, when I entered the campus overwhelmed with all these feelings, the first people I met were those from the costume department. They were always the first ones to arrive – Natascha, Nikita, Niti and the costume dadas. There was a whole bunch of background artists too and the biggest challenge for the costume department was to ensure that they all had the right costumes for the shot. I saw, in the days to come, that this was one of the most tedious tasks of the process because they had to make sure no clothes were repeated and at the same time, were not even close to what the lead actors were wearing. Imagine doing this for hundreds of people multiple times every day! And still, they seemed to be doing it efficiently with very little commotion!

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We were to start with a canteen scene where I was just to stand in a queue and react. Sid was given a similar activity and position too. And as we got ready, Arjun and Alia walked in looking great as usual. We did a couple of rehearsals and during all this, Nikita walked up to me and said ‘You need to change, right now! Here, in the corner!’ The director wanted me to wear a red kurta coz he felt that suited the frame better. I knew the cameras were set up and I did not have much time for me to be shy and move out. So I quickly changed in a corner right in front of Nikita putting to end any hope of waiting till the day I have a good enough physique to be flaunted before the prettiest girl from costumes. The scene was then captured from various angles and we then broke for lunch. As the day progressed, it became more and more difficult to handle the background artists. It was a hot day in Ahmadabad (well, when is it not?!) and the fans had to be switched off to capture the dialogues without unwanted sounds from the background. This made the artists cranky and they, in turn, were giving the ADs a tough time. A lot of effort went into making them go back to their first marks for every take, making them do what was needed to be done. This is where ADs Neil and Karina were doing a terrific job. They ensured that despite all the issues, everyone and everything was as required right before it was time to roll. Arif was in complete control as the first AD. There was a point when there was complete chaos but one loud shout out by Arif and there was pin drop silence. He had that kind of authority! Amidst all this, Arjun and Alia kept their cool and performed the scene with ease. The scene went on for a while and I wasn’t required for the later part. I was waiting at a table away from the scene location when I first met a girl who went on to become my closest friend in Ahmadabad – Sakshi Soni. We had a little chat about who we were and what we did and while we were chatting about random stuff, pack up for day 1 was announced.

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Sid and me went back to our hotel which was about a 30-minute drive from IIM. Later, AD Siddhanth called me from Karina’s phone and I joked how shouting at the background artists had changed Karina’s voice to that of a man. He didnt laugh but I thought it was hilarious. We had some delicious dinner followed by refreshing buttermilk (I had almost 4-5 glasses… everyday) and then went off to sleep.

It was an early morning call time for the next day too.. And the days to come. This time, there was a dialogue to be taken but once again, it was given to Siddharth with me just reacting in the background. I saw him being miked up and then I saw our director, Abhishek discussing the whole scene with him. Binod Sir also gave him certain instructions and the make-up men started giving him the final touch-ups. For the 10 minutes before the shot was to be captured, Sid was the centre of everyone’s attention. And sitting there behind him, I was wondering how cool it is to be in such a place. It happens to the stars all the time, now it was happening to Siddharth. And soon some day, it would happen to me too. The whole experience of actually discussing a scene with the director and the cinematographer! Binod Sir even joked about how he should avoid calling out “Mohit” because whenever he did so, all five of us looked at him. So, he made it a point to memorize Siddharth’s name.

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As the shot was being set up, Arjun and Alia – the gorgeous GORGEOUS Alia – walked in. There was something about this girl. Every time you looked at her, she looked prettier and cuter than the last time.

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Sid had a chat with Arjun about the earthquake in Delhi and some other things. Meanwhile, Binod Sir was ready to roll and the shot was captured in 2 takes. While I was glad to be in the middle of it all, absorbing the feeling of being on such a lively film set, I was naturally a bit upset for not getting a line to say and all the focus and attention that comes with it. While I kept calming myself down thinking this is just the beginning and there is a long way to go, AD Ishaan sensed something wrong with me and after the shot, walked up to me and said ‘You have a very expressive face… you did well in the scene’. I understood that he probably did this just to make me feel better. Nevertheless, it was very sweet of him to do so and it made me feel a lot happier 😀 I met Sakshi between shots and we continued chatting about stuff. We even rehearsed for a line that she was to say but it was later given to someone else. We both smiled about how it was a no-dialogue day for both us and consoled ourselves saying, “We don’t need lines to act!” 😀 Soon, we were all done for the day and while we were on our way back to the hotel, Sid got a call from home. He later informed me that his mom was having some health issues so he had to go back to Mumbai for a couple of days. He was to leave the next day – the day I got a reality check about the life of actors who are just starting out…

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Costume trial at Dharma Productions

I got a call from Nikita to visit the Dharma office for a costume trial a week before the Ahmadabad schedule of Two States was to begin. This was going to be my first costume trial and I was kind-of excited about it. When I got to the Dharma office at Khar, a strange (truly Bollywood!) thing happened. I was waiting at the reception for someone to come and escort me inside for the trial when I saw a huge picture of Mr. Yash Johar on the reception wall. I looked at it for a while with a smile and before I knew it, I was having a conversation in my head with Mr. Yash Johar.

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Yes, I know this is filmy but what can I say? It did happen! It might have happened to most of you at some point or the other.  Of course, my rational mind tells me that this was my own imagination and it was really just me speaking from both sides. However, I also would not like to rule out the possibility that Mr. Johar was actually present there in spirit! It was a very personal conversation which lasted for a couple of minutes and by the end of it, I felt very nice, calm and confident. It was almost like speaking with my own grandfather! Just then, Kriti came and took me to the room where the costume trial was being conducted.

I entered the room with 4 pretty girls including Nikita and Natascha browsing through heaps of clothes and accessories. My co-actor Siddharth was to be there too but he was a little late so they started with me. Nikita gave me my first set of clothes and continued looking at other stuff. Now, I was standing in the room with all these girls and had no clue whether I was to step out to some other room to change or was expected to change right there. I was blank and just stood there for a few seconds which is when Nikita asked, “Do you want us to step out?”. In my head, I said “Yeah…aaaah obviously!!!” This is when I thought that may be all other actors who come for a costume trial at Dharma have great bodies and are never shy to change in front of girls. But my case was different. I was MONTHS of gymming away from having a physique ready to be flaunted before girls. Yes, as an actor you are supposed to be comfortable with your body and not be so conscious. But for me, it was much easier to go shirtless on stage or before the camera than in a situation like this. So they stepped out and I changed inside the room as quickly as I could. Little did I know that there was going to be a day during the shoot when I would have to change on set before 60 people (including the ones present in this room)!

After the first set, I volunteered to step out to the rest room and change instead of making all of them leave. With regard to the costume, I was loving everything that they were giving me. I always knew Dharma is excellent when it comes to costumes. I was happy with the look I was being given! In a little while, Siddharth came along and he was given his costumes too. This is also where I first met Nitee, a costume AD whom I was to work with for 15 days in the Ahmadabad schedule. She was a cool, fun-loving girl who had worked with Siddharth earlier and chatted with him most of the time during the trial. I was done with all the costumes in about half an hour. I thanked the costume team and went on to meet Arif, the first AD. I wanted to let him know that if there are any days when I would not be shooting as an actor, I would like to be a part of the ADing team. It was better to be on set and learn stuff rather than sit in the hotel room doing nothing. Arif informed me that I would be shooting almost every day but if there was a time when he can use me as an AD, he will. On my way out, I looked at Mr. Johar’s picture once again with a smile and left the Dharma office awaiting my first outdoor schedule for a film!

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My first day of shoot for 2 states

8th of February, 2013 – Perhaps one of the biggest days of my life! I picked up my co-actor Siddharth at 7.30am and biked up to Filmistan at Goregaon by 7.45. The Production team had just arrived and was busy setting up stuff. We did not know where to go but Siddharth managed to speak with someone from Production who got us into a room. It was right next to a room labelled Director and DOP. Siddharth, having done a couple of ad films, a TV soap and some ads, knew his way around things. For the rest of the day, he kept guiding me through stuff and telling me what to do and what not to do. He also apologized every once in a while for giving me too much gyaan 😀

After a while, Kriti from the direction department came to us and introduced herself. It was early in the morning but she already looked charged up and on the run. In fact, for the whole day from there on, I noticed Kriti and the other ADs to be on the move and always caught up with something or the other. It’s like they had wheels for feet. I saw Siddhanth, the AD who had been co-ordinating with us before the shoot, continuously taking instructions on the walkie and making sure everybody is where they are supposed to be for things to progress as per schedule. I had been an AD on two ad films a couple of weeks ago so I kind-of knew what was going on. To start with, Kriti introduced us to Nikita from costumes (the same girl who had given me the ego-boosting call a day ago 🙂 – read previous post). I had caught a glimpse of Nikita’s picture on Whatsapp when I was chatting with her about the costumes but she was way prettier in person. She visited our room to see the costume options we were carrying for the shoot. She did not like anything we had. So, she went back and sent her choice of clothes with her assistant Mehboob. I was first given a T-shirt and a pair of boxers. I put them on and was fine with them but when Nikita came for a check, I think she wasn’t impressed with what she saw. So my boxers were replaced with checked pyjamas 😀 Siddharth was given a pair of spectacles which gave him the perfect nerd look.

My co-actor Siddharth
My co-actor Siddharth

We were then introduced to our make-up man Anees bhai with whom we spent most part of the day while waiting for our shot. Our make-up, hardly any, was done in 5 minutes. Post that, I started rehearsing my single line several times. Siddharth rehearsed with me a couple of times and then asked me to chill but I thought I should be a well-oiled machine by the time we have to shoot. I also went on to the set to get a feel of the hostel that my character was supposed to live in. And this is where, amongst a bunch of ADs, technicians, and other crew members, I saw our director Abhishek Varman. He was sitting on a bed in one of the hostel room set-ups figuring certain things out. He was surrounded by no less than 10 people. I was looking at him from a distance so I first thought it was Arjun Kapoor rehearsing his part but as I went closer I realized it was someone else. He was a young, handsome-looking lad and one could easily think he is one of the stars in the film. I was later told that he is the director. Anyway, I did not want to get in the middle of what was happening so I went outside one of the hostel room doors and started rehearsing my line the way I figured it was to be shot.

While rehearsing, I couldn’t help but notice the brilliance of the art department. The place really looked like a hostel with great attention paid to minute details. The texture of the walls, the notices put up for students, the beds, books and posters inside the room – everything was SPOT ON! I was already in costume so the moment I stepped on to the set, I felt I was actually a student living in a hostel. This made me wonder about the beauty of the whole process of film-making – how the efforts of all the other teams come together to help an actor when he is performing. While I was still letting this feeling of being on a real film set sink in, I had attracted the attention of enough ADs and gained the reputation of an unwanted element on the sets. So, one of the ADs came to me and politely said “As you can see, it’s a small set and there are a lot of people. We don’t want it to get too crowded here so would you mind staying in your room?”. I apologized for causing trouble if any and headed back to my room.

I was waiting outside my room at Filmistan when I first saw the hero of our film – Arjun Kapoor. He was shirtless (for most part of the day actually) and was having a word with a couple of crew members just outside the door of the studio we were to shoot in. He looked like someone full of energy and raring to go – a bit like how basketball players look just before play-off! I had seen him in Ishaqzaade and liked his portrayal of a raw hooligan turned Romeo. I had also read some articles about him and some of his interviews. Knowing that he is Boney Kapoor’s son and seeing his performance in Ishaqzaade, I sure thought he was going to be one of the biggies in the time to come. 10 minutes later, Siddharth and me were called for a rehearsal. My heart beat started racing as I realized I was going to be rehearsing my little scene in front of the director and stars of the film. Siddharth had to go back at the last moment for some costume related issue so I reached the set before him. And there, I saw her who is arguably the cutest girl of our times – Alia Bhatt. Even in a simple green kurti and blue jeans, the she looked gorgeous!

Image courtesy: @2states_FC on twitter
Image courtesy: @2states_FC on twitter

Now, a little while ago when we were waiting in our room for someone to call us when our shot is ready, Siddharth and Anees Bhai were discussing a lot of stuff about almost all the actors they had worked with. They spoke about whom they liked and whom they didn’t, what the latest gossip in the industry is, what new projects are in the making, etc. I, being the least experienced, was just listening to this conversation and enjoying it. The one thing that came out in this conversation was how Alia had gained the reputation of a very very sweet girl. Everyone from the costume guy to the make-up man to the production people vouched for her sweetness and humility. And Alia proved how true this was when we shot our scene with her.

So I was there on the set, ready with my costume and make-up to rehearse the line that Sid and me were supposed to say. The cinematographer was the great Mr. Binod Pradhan! I recognized him the moment I saw him as I had seen him in the making videos of films like Munnabhai M.B.B.S. He was busy setting up the frame and adjusting the lights as per his requirements. Sid hadn’t showed up yet so the director Abhishek asked me to say the line once. Nervous as hell, I did. He asked me to tone it down a bit. I did. And then when Siddharth arrived, he made Siddharth do the same thing. Finally, he decided that Siddharth will take the line and I will just react. I felt disappointed for a few seconds as all my rehearsals during the day had just gone down the drain. “What did I do wrong?” I kept thinking. However, in a while, something happened that changed my mood completely. I was standing with Sid outside the closed door of Arjun’s hostel room waiting for instructions from our director to begin the rehearsal. All of a sudden, the door opened and Alia and Arjun showed up. I thought we were already in the scene and looked at them shocked. “Sorry”, I said thinking that I have messed up by not paying attention. At this, Alia looked at me surprised and gave a huge smile which then transformed into a little giggle. Her eyes lit up while mine were glued to hers. In a split second, I noticed her lips, her teeth and a bit of her make-up. It was one of those speechless, “Wow!” moments when you see a pretty girl smiling right at you! 🙂 Almost simultaneously, Arjun laughed about all this and tapped me on the shoulder saying “Relax, we are not rehearsing” and they both walked away. They were taking a little break. All this happened within just a few seconds but this incident worked wonders for me. I felt relaxed and comfortable with whatever and whoever was around me.  Alia’s lovely smile has stayed with me ever since and continues to mesmerize me even as I write today! 🙂

The lovely Aliya Bhatt
The lovely Alia Bhatt

After a bit, when Arjun was walking around, I gathered some courage to say Hi. I shook hands with him and told him my name and that I was playing one of the Mohits. “Nice to meet you”, he said. Alia was standing right next to him but I did not have the balls to speak with her. I was too much in awe of our first encounter to be able to say anything. Later, we did rehearse the line a couple of times with Siddharth saying what he was supposed to and me reacting as Alia looked right into my eyes. It came pretty naturally to me actually. Later, Aliya was sweet enough to mention to Siddharth that he was doing a great job. She made his day and for the rest of the shoot, he joined the Alia Bhatt fan club that the other crew members were already a part of. Even on our way back home, he couldn’t stop talking about how cool it was for Alia to have acknowledged his work.

After the rehearsal, we were given chairs to sit on the set for a while. There was still some time for our shot as Arjun and Alia were shooting for another scene. For me, this was another awesome experience in itself. I saw how the first AD, Arif, took complete control of the set and made sure everything was flowing smoothly for the director and actors to work on. He was polite to actors and crew members for most part of the shoot but whenever things started going out of control or the place got noisy, he shouted in a commanding voice putting the place to drop-dead silence. Pravesh, the chief AD, on the other hand was quieter but equally in control of things making sure everything went as planned. He was less intimidating than Arif though 😀 Every time Binod Sir was ready to roll, Arif shouted “Silence” at the top of his voice followed by 4 other people shouting the same at different corners of the studio right till the door outside. It was like a wave echoing from one end of the studio to the other leading to absolute silence. After this, nobody dared to utter a word till the scene was performed and Abhishek said either “Cut it, one more” or “Cut it, okay” in one breath. It was a really cool scene that was being shot and I enjoyed watching on the monitor how Alia and Arjun were performing. They looked terrific together and I can’t wait to see how this scene will turn out to be on the big screen!

Image courtesy: @AliaasAngels on Twitter
Image courtesy: @AliaasAngels on Twitter

A few takes later, their scene was ‘okay’ed by Abhishek and it was time for us to shoot. Siddharth and me were ready to roll. We were given marks near the door where we needed to stand. Alia too was given her mark and once Binod Sir was ready with lights and camera, Abhishek ordered “Action”. We wrapped up our shot in about 3 minutes. We were then asked to relax till further notice. So, we headed back to our room and chilled out for a while. I walked out for snacks and had a chat with Alam, who was handling the security near the door. He told me about how he works different shifts on different shoots and that he plans to have a shop of his own some day. I wished him luck and moved on to chat with Acheet, the production in-charge who had looked after us since morning. He made sure Sid got his coffee the way he wanted it, he made sure I had eaten lunch and snacks whenever they were ready to be served, and he made sure we got everything we needed. It is amazing how special production people make actors feel. They deserve to be thanked much more than anyone else because they truly make sure that actors are comfortable and in their right mind to perform well. I thanked Acheet for all his help during the day and headed back to Sid to hear some more from him about shoots, actors, how to behave in front of stars and how not to 😀 We also caught a glimpse of Prabhu Deva and Shruti Hassan who were walking towards the studio next to us. “Hello Prabhu Sir”, Siddharth shouted out. Prabhu Sir responded with a smile and walked away 🙂 By the end of the day, I had developed a very friendly equation with Sid. It really felt like we were two roommates living in a hostel discussing stuff about life, work, girls, and what the future holds for us. I no longer felt insecure about him getting more screen time than me as I figured we were both sailing in the same boat and we will both make something out of whatever we get. Plus, it was just the beginning of a long career ahead. An actor’s career cannot and should not just depend upon how many lines he says in a film. It should be more about how true and dedicated he is to the character he is playing. With that thought, I told myself that I should stop caring about how much footage I will get in 2 states and just enjoy my part and do it well.

At around 8.30pm, we were called to the set again to take another shot from behind our back (called an OTS – Over the shoulder) to capture Alia’s dialogue. During this shot, I noticed our director Abhishek’s reactions when he was looking at the monitor while Alia and Arjun were performing. It was like he was present in the scene as a character himself. Everything being said by any actor was being said to him bringing out his natural reactions. I saw how he was smiling when Alia took her line. I thought this is the first, honest, purest reaction to the scene and may be this is exactly how the audience will feel when they watch the scene for the first time. This thought made me smile as much as Abhishek 🙂

Finally, at 9.15pm, Arif told us that it was pack-up for Siddharth and me. We left the studio while Alia and Arjun were still working. They had come in at 9 in the morning and were still going strong. Understandably, they had more scenes to do than anybody else. Add to that the various pressures that come with stardom. It’s a tough life I thought, but yet, something to die for. When I was in front of the camera reacting to Alia, I once again felt like I did when I was ADing a couple of weeks ago. I felt this is where I want to be – in whatever capacity possible! The lights, the camera, the sound, the sets, the cast and crew slogging their asses off – THIS IS LIFE! And every bit of success that comes to anyone who is a part of this world is truly well-deserved. Almost every soul you see on a film set looks inspiring and driven by passion, dedication, creativity and hard work. Each one knows that it’s a struggle and they are all up for it. And this is what makes me feel that I would rather be here than anywhere else.

Filmistan - right outside studio 6 where we shot
Filmistan – right outside studio 6 where we shot

I left the studio at 9.45pm and as I rode towards Andheri and reflected back on the happenings of the day, I couldn’t help but pray that my part in the film gets bigger and better in the Ahmadabad schedule in April (yeah, all that self-thought about being satisfied with whatever I get wasn’t working). Till then, it was time to get back to more theatre, auditions and meetings…

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A small role in Dharma’s ‘2 states’

A couple of months ago, the path ahead looked hazy. All I knew was that I wanted to make it big as an actor. How I would begin and what will get me there was something that stumped me. Yes, I had been at it for many years but the only thing I was working on at that moment was my play ‘Shakespeare Who?’. Knowing that theatre won’t pay me well always made me feel insecure about the future. Some solid roles that give me recognition as a good actor, make me a familiar face and get me more work were the need of the hour. I needed a fresh beginning. I thought I will start by contacting all the casting directors and co-ordinators I know of. My friends Shikha and Bisht also helped me with some contacts of people I could get in touch with. So I sent my pictures to all the email Ids I had and started following up with them by calling them every once in a while. This is when I happened to speak with casting director Nandini Shrikent. She told me she had seen my pictures and will let me know if something comes up. “Everyone says that but nobody ever gets back”, I said to myself! However, two days later when I was at home working on the lines of my play, I got a call from Dharma Productions. It was from a girl named Rachna who asked me if I can come for an audition for ‘2 States’. Nandini had referred my name to Dharma. This was a pleasant surprise 🙂 I hadn’t read the book  ‘2 states’ but I knew that it was a blockbuster by the new Indian youth icon Chetan Bhagat!

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I showed up all excited at the Dharma office the next day. Rachna briefed me about the character and the little scene I needed to perform. It was for a part named Mohit who is an IIM student and friends with the protagonist. I knew the moment Rachna described the character to me that it’s a very small part – like one of those students in the background that you see hanging around with the hero in college love stories. Nevertheless, it was a big production house and I had nothing else to start with. I felt this was a blessing and something that could set the ball rolling for me. So I gave the audition and then forgot about it because that’s the best way to keep oneself away from the stress and anxiety of wanting to get through.

After a few days, when I was ADing in an ad film (read previous posts), I got a call from Rachna that I was shortlisted for the part of Mohit. This got me really excited because it was my first film role in my new life as just an actor! However, this was also the worst phase because once you get a shortlist call, you keep wondering when you will get the final call that says you have been locked for the part. I had been shortlisted for a couple of films before (like David Dhawan’s Chashme Baddoor) but had never received the final calls. So this made me very nervous. That’s when my friend Nidhi Singh calmed me down saying that I should be happy that I at least got shortlisted. It means that I must have done something right and someone likes me. Later at home, my roomie Nikhil too asked me to just forget about it and focus on the play and other auditions. Although I did take their advice, I kept my fingers crossed.

On the 4th of February, I finally got the call. Sharikh from Dharma Productions called me to discuss the fees and when I agreed, he said I was locked for the part. I was told that I will be needed for a couple of days in Mumbai in the month of February and then for 3-4 days in Ahmadabad in the month of April. I was to get a call from an AD later to confirm the shoot dates. Later that night I did get a call from Siddhanth, an AD with Dharma, to let me know that I would be needed in the Mumbai schedule for any 1-2 days between the 6th and 11th. This was a potential problem because my play date (as in the date of my theatre play and not the one related to single parents :P) was the 10th of Feb. It was weird that I hadn’t even started out in the industry yet and was already having date issues 😀 I told Siddhanth about this and he assured me that my shoot will certainly be done before the 10th. That was a relief and finally, I could tell myself that I had bagged my first role as a character in a feature film! I sent Nandini a “thank you” message informing her that I got through and expressing how grateful I was for this opportunity. She replied joking that she obviously knew that I got through as she was the one doing the casting 🙂

I was called for a line-run a couple of days later at the same venue where I had auditioned for the part. This is where I met a guy named Siddharth Amar. He was an actor too and seemed shocked to know that I am playing Mohit. “That can’t be true, I am the one playing Mohit”, he said. Now, once I got the final selection call, I had picked up Chetan’s novel and quickly read through the IIM bit of it. That’s how I knew that there were 5 Mohits in the story. I drew Siddharth’s attention to this and told him that there is a probability that we have been cast to play 2 of the 5 Mohits. May be, there were 3 more coming. We waited anxiously when an AD named Ishaan entered the office. I thought he was an actor too because he looked nothing less than a Hero. This, I thought, was one striking thing about all Dharma ADs I met in the future. They were all capable of giving actors and models an inferiority complex! Anyway, Ishaan greeted us, introduced himself, and asked us to have a seat till the other ADs arrive. He also clarified that there are indeed 5 Mohits but we were the ones with a couple of dialogues in the film. The others would probably stand by and react. In a while, the other ADs Siddhanth and Karina arrived and started setting up the lights and camera for our rehearsal. We were then introduced to the first AD Arif (who was pretty much the dynamic driving force on the day of the shoot, but more on that later). While Arif was checking the set up, we were given a line to rehearse. This line was split between Siddharth and me. Arif made us rehearse together a few times and then captured it on camera. Once he was happy with the take, he let us go saying he will see us on the day of the shoot.

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As I left the Dharma office, I was feeling a bit sad about having to share my footage with another actor. I thought I could see what was coming. It was a small part to begin with and there was a further split in footage with someone else. May be it was not really a part in which I will be seen or noticed. I mean, there were going to be 4 more Mohits for crying out loud! However, I immediately realized that I cannot be so negative about it. It was a ray of hope. It was my first project with a huge production house and if I am good, it could lead to bigger, better roles. Also, I thought feeling insecure due to other actors around me is probably a part and parcel of this industry (or any for that matter). So I had to deal with it sooner or later. I thought the best way to go about it was to make friends with him and try and create something good together by complementing each other. So I put all these feelings behind me and started eagerly waiting for the day of the shoot.

One day before the shoot, I got a call from Nikita from the costume department for my measurements. She asked me for my shirt and trouser size and also advised me to carry a few options like T-shirts, track pants, college casuals, and floaters on the day of the shoot. This was my first costume call and it made me feel – “Wooaaahh!! I feel like a professional, working actor now” 😀 AD Siddhanth informed me that the call time for the next day was 8 am. My co-actor Siddharth – the other Mohit – called me to say that he will be coming along with me on my bike. And there I was – on the eve of my first day of shoot for Dharma Productions’ 2 States.

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Getting to know Shakespeare…

William Shakespeare. I had read about this writer during college days, tried to get through some of his text every once in a while (never successfully completing more than 5 pages), and often gone off to sleep after being fed up of not understanding what was written (or why???).  I always felt Shakespeare was the territory of geeks, or English scholars or those who pretend to understand his writing just so that they can come off as a class above the rest. My biggest Shakespeare experience was when I was handling production work for Mr. Neeraj Kabi back in 2005. The play I worked on was the most famous play ever written – HAMLET. Neeraj Sir’s version of Hamlet was the finest play I had seen with an integration of the Indian art forms Yakshagana and Dhrupad to bring to life this amazing piece of text on stage!

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After that, I did not do anything related to Shakespeare. Of course, I kept hearing lame uses of his famous quotes by people who had no clue what they mean; the most frequent one being – “To be or not to be, that is the question”. I used to wonder how almost every man on earth knows just this one line written by Shakespeare and flaunts this knowledge by using the line in any damn context of life just for the heck of it. For instance, in a recent movie, a guy jokes about a bra saying – 2 B or 32 B, that is the question! Nevertheless, the thought of Shakespeare always made me curious and I wanted to know why this man is supposed to be so great!

And now – 7 years later, my friend, director and co-actor Nidhi Bisht has given me an opportunity to be a part of a Shakespeare play as an actor. It all began a couple of months ago when she introduced me and our whole theatre group NBTV (New Brain Theatre Volks) to a man who was crazy about Shakespeare, a brilliant actor and an amazing teacher – Dehshat Vansadia (his name is Deshik but I have stuck to Dehshat since the day I met him). Dehshat is an alumnus of the Stella Adler School of acting and has also been part of the Shakespeare theatre company. He had come back to India a few months ago and was aiming to bring to life Shakespeare’s plays in their raw form. He felt that almost all the Shakespeare work being done here is in adapted versions. He wanted to perform Shakespeare plays just the way they are. So Nidhi and Dehshat got together and we were all called for a meeting about this project.

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It started with Dehshat conducting workshops for the first few days. We sat and chatted about who we are, what we do, what our association with Shakespeare has been (if any). This was followed by physical exercises, voice exercises, acting exercises. Once Dehshat felt that we had warmed up enough, we began working with text. The emphasis was always on being true to oneself and speaking from where we are rather than forcing the performance. Dehshat made us see what the text really implies and how we can find a connection with what was written. He made us close our eyes and narrated stories or situations that invoked different emotions in us. The detailing he did while narrating these imaginative plots was just terrific. It would really get to our inner self and by the end of the exercise, each actor felt lighter and a bit more opened up than before. He said the essence of what we went through during such exercises should be used in our performance. We then started working on speeches and scenes for which Dehshat made us put to use all the work we did during the exercises. This was (and still is) the most challenging part of the process. While Shakespeare’s language is rich and does most of the work when you are performing something from his text, you need to have your foundations as an actor in place to make sure you do a good job. It was during the scenes and speeches that I really started questioning my acting methods and skills as a performer.

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After a few days of performing scenes and speeches, we started putting the play on its feet. The lines were memorized and the moves were choreographed. Later during the process, a stick fight was to be introduced into the piece. We decided to go with the martial art form of Silumbum for which rehearsals and training began in full flow. Our dear Nidhi Singh who plays the Joan of Arc in the fight suffered some brutal blows while rehearsing but the strong girl that she is, she just cast them off casually with no pain.

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What was also noteworthy during our rehearsals was the coming together of the two Nidhis as Roma and Juliet. No matter what time of the day it was, or what the mood of the group was – there was always a romantic chemistry going on between these two.

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The biggest nautankis of the group – Bisht and Singham always painted the rehearsals red with their love and affection for each other! Their histrionics kept me alive and ticking whenever I was exhausted. Prashant and Pallavi, the couple of our group, worked really hard to manage their busy schedules to get to rehearsals every day. I feel it was due to this hard work that towards the end of the rehearsal process, the two of them showed maximum growth as performers. They were a part of all the fun and frolic during the long rehearsals that brought us closer as a bunch of actors. And at the center of all this was our director Deshik (enough with the Dehshat joke I guess :P). It was great to be listening to his anecdotes and discussions about acting and several other topics ranging over all fields of life. His accent was the talk of the town and the subject of many jokes or a long time (and still is). However, it is commendable how well Deshik handled this group. He was a sport during lighter moments and a firm director during the more serious ones. He molded each one of us right from day 1 and such was his impact on us that as of today, I (and I guess most actors in the group) feel that he is one of the most amazing actors I have come across and the most terrific teacher I have been trained by. Such is his talent and determination that it seems fairly obvious that this guy is going to go places. It was great to see how well, under Deshik’s guidance, the group bonded and how each one grew as the days went by.

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Speaking of myself – while working on this play, I realized how bad and unworthy I am as an actor. It made me feel that in so many years that have passed by, in all the talk about making it big in the industry, in all the talk about passion for acting and chasing my dream, I haven’t really worked enough on my art. Yes, I have done a few workshops here and there. Yes, I have performed in a few plays and short films. However, being an actor needs much more than that. One needs to practise and implement things done in the workshops on a daily basis. Acting is an art which needs discipline. It needs rehearsal. It needs a lot of hard work, research, sincerity and bravery – bravery to visit corners of your mind and heart that you tread to, bravery to put yourself through situations you would hate to, to make yourself think about things that you hesitate to. I had been working as an actor just on the surface without really getting into the internal fundamentals. Therefore, I am grateful that at this stage I was introduced to Shakespeare. Grateful because I realized that if you are willing to open up as an actor and explore what’s inside you – there can be nobody better than Shakespeare to help you with it. What is great about Shakespeare is – if you give a go at him with all your heart, you will find yourself on a journey ranging through every human emotion there is. It may seem as an actor’s nightmare but in reality – it is an actor’s paradise!

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I have learnt a lot from this project.  The whole process right from warm-ups to speech and scene work to full run-throughs has been exceptional. As an actor, it has been the richest experience for me so far! Although I don’t think I can call myself a very good actor yet, I know that I have found a path to work towards it. I am going to try and incorporate stuff learnt from this project in my daily routine. I am also going to try and be, in whatever capacity possible, a part of every Shakespeare play that Deshik and NBTV work on in the future.

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To start this new ride with Shakespeare, we perform a piece named Shakespeare, Who? this Sunday, the 10th of Feb at Andheri. Can’t wait to be on stage again!  🙂

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Two short films for Anurag Kashyap…

Till a few months ago, I used to live in a 3BHK flat in the New Mhada colony at Andheri West. It was more a dormitory than a flat really. We were 11 people living there with each one given a bed and a cupboard. When you entered the house, you could see 3 beds (small-sized ones called diwans) in the hall with dirty mattresses on them and no bedsheets. As you moved further in, there was the kitchen – the worst in the world.. with all kinds of food particles, used utensils, uncovered beverages and sometimes even beer bottles lying around near the gas stove. Then came the three bedrooms with 3 small sized beds each. I would like to believe that mine was the cleanest bed! 😀

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There were all kinds of issues at that flat – water scarcity, shabby rooms, stinking loos, bed bugs (ohhh God those cruel bed bugs!!), money and food items being stolen, fights amongst the guys.. you name it! However, the best part about living there was the different kinds of people I got to meet. Most of us were aspiring actors but there was also a cinematographer – Raj, an aspiring writer – Rahul and an aspiring film-maker – the one and only – our Tibetan friend Pasang Tashi! 🙂

On one Sunday, when we were getting some pesticides sprayed to get some relief from our dear bed bugs, it became impossible for us to hang out in our respective rooms due to the unbearable smell. So, we all gathered in our drawing room which was comparatively more spacious and less claustrophobic! That’s when it struck me that what we had in our flat was a great bunch of talent in all fields of film making and we should use it in some way. So while we were all watching some show on TV, I told everyone that we should stop wasting our time like this and do something constructive.. why not make a short film?!? We had actors, a writer, a cinematographer and a director. A camera could be arranged from the film school Raj went to. And that’s when Rahul came in!

My ex-flatmate Rahul is a weird man. He always told us that he was an HR guy working for Citibank and is waiting to join some Mumbai branch in a few days. However, what we later realized was that he was an aspiring writer who had given up his high profile job to pursue his dream of writing and film-making. He had already written a full-fledged film script and was in touch with Anurag Kashyap about it! When I brought up the idea of a short film, we asked Rahul if he can write something. He said he will think about it and the discussion ended there. Little did we know that Rahul will be ready with a story and a short film script the same night!

It was 1 a.m. when Rahul knocked on our room door. I was asleep because I had to get to work the next day, so I wasn’t really interested in entertaining Rahul at that hour. However, he insisted that we gather in one of the rooms as he had something important to share. The last time this had happened was when our friend Kartik Tiwari had broken to us the news of him being the lead actor in a film – Pyaar ka Punchnama  😀 Anyway, so we all went and were surprised by what happened in the next half an hour. Rahul gave us a narration of the short film he had in mind – scene by scene, angle by angle! He came across as an aspiring film-maker from the Kashyap school – clearly wanting to make a project that will appeal to Anurag! 🙂 We were impressed by his enthusiasm and his eye for detail and decided to start work on the short film from the next weekend itself with my roomie Randhir and me playing protagonists. The idea was to wrap up the film in two weekends max!! It turned out that it was too ambitious for us to think so! 😛

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The first two days of shoot was a lot of fun and hard work. We woke up at 5 am I think. Rahul had locations for shooting in mind. So we just blindly followed wherever he took us and whatever he made us do. I had a Maruti Zen which we used for our travelling. Rahul was clear that we will not spend a single penny in the making of this film. However, I don’t think he realized that I was spending quite some money on the fuel for my car to take us to all our shoot locations 😛 We finished a lot of scenes in the first two days. But as the days passed by, Rahul was not happy with some of the scenes which he decided to re-write and re-shoot. Later, Rahul attended the Mami film festival and got some new ideas and inspirations. He decided to change the whole plot from a two-protagonist story to that of one – mine!

The entire journey was a whole lot of fun but we also faced a lot of problems! One of the biggest issues was availability of a camera. We started off with a Canon 60D to shoot the film but were eventually left only with an iphone 4 and later a Galaxy s2 to finish the remaining portion. I will never forget the fights our cinematographer Raj had with Rahul. Raj has a filmmaker in himself too and as one would expect – two filmmakers coming together for one project can never be an easy task 😛 I must say here that Raj is exceptional with the camera. He takes the most difficult shots with bare hands needing no tripod or support. Such steadiness with the camera is God’s gift to him I believe. However, his views on the scenes and the camera angles never matched with those of Rahul. He laughed at most of the things Rahul said. And Rahul rejected most of the suggestions Raj gave. Raj went on and on about jump cuts and other technical things and Rahul went on and on about how his film is “different” and how he still thinks the shots will look good the way he wants them!! I am surprised at how these two could even manage finishing this project together 😀

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The film was named Once upon a writer. During shooting for OUAW, I did a lot of things which were new to me as an actor! We shot at the flat, on roads, at a beach, at offices, at the compound of a gym, at the terrace of a building and some other places – for most of these places, we had no permission to shoot so we had to manage shooting with hidden cameras 😀  Also, most of the scenes we shot were later edited out. The script was changed a couple of times too. Yet, the passion of filming something new everyday remained our best memory from this experience. One of the most memorable events was when we had to shoot a scene with Eunuchs (who are sex-workers) at around 12 in the night. It was difficult to talk to them with a camera and there are cops on the lookout all the time. After a couple of attempts, we did get hold of one but while we were having the conversation about  our film and what we needed her to do for the shoot, a cop van headed towards us. We dashed towards my car, got in and fled but the cops didn’t give up. They decided to chase my car! For the next 5 minutes, I had my heart in my mouth as I drove the fastest I could through the roads of Andheri West – Millat Nagar, Oshiwara, and the Back road to get back to our New Mhada flat. Once we reached home, we had a big laugh about all of it. Two days later, we tried again and this time, our friend Victor was actually caught. We ran away and waited at a distance to see what’s happening to him. When they didn’t let him go after 5 minutes, we decided to approach the cops to rescue our friend. Tashi showed them his I-card from the film school and said we were working on some project. They understood that we are innocent guys and let us go but not before cracking a racist comment on Tashi – “Tum China mein jaao”. I felt like getting back at them but I did not want Tashi to get into trouble because of my reaction, so we just left. Later, Victor convinced one of the Eunuchs to come home to shoot the scene and the scene was modified to be shot in our flat. I must admit that Rupali (a.k.a Angel) was extremely professional and finished the shot in 10 minutes. We had dinner with her and then Victor dropped her back.

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So we had a lot of fun and learnt a lot during all this and finally.. after almost 6 months (yes, that’s how long it took) our short film was ready to be edited. And that’s when our editor Ankit Halai came in. He had edited my first short film Ek Choti Si Asha and was now working on this one taking time out of his busy schedule. There were clashes between Rahul and him too, sometimes due to their schedules, and sometimes due to creative differences. Rahul had to give in most of the times because we needed Ankit’s office to shoot a couple of scenes 😛 Anyway, they did finally manage to sit together and finish off the film.

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Once this film was done, Rahul submitted it at Anurag’s office. He then wanted to make another short film based on his full-fledged film script that he had sent to Anurag Kashyap. So, he wrote down a shorter version and began shooting with Nikhil Pandey and me. Nikhil is my roommate now and also my co-actor in my plays Holi and Who let the dogs out. I remember all my office girls falling for his cute looks (whatever :S) when they had seen Holi. I have always liked him as an actor and am now working with him on another play (Othello… more about that later). I think he has done a pretty good job in this short film too. It’s called We, The People and will be ready in a few days.  Our cinematographer for this one is Vin Maurya – a talented guy from Nepal who tolerates Rahul much better than Raj or Tashi 😛 However, Rahul is really unfortunate in one regard – none of his cinematographers know Hindi well – be it Tashi – the Tibetan, Raj – the Telugu Hyderabadi or Vin – the Nepali 😀

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I am hoping to use some footage from both these short films along with that of my plays and make a showreel at the earliest. I can then approach some casting directors and production houses with the showreel trying to convince them that I am a good actor! J In the meantime, Rahul awaits Anurag Kashyap’s feedback on the film and I can’t stop myself from hoping that may be he (or his casting director Mukesh Chhabra) sees something good in the actors 😉